Giving it to You Straight

Where violence is concerned, I think both men and women want people to give it to them straight. As much fun as I have engaging in and teaching life-preservation techniques, lives are truly changed when people start to gain a better understanding of violence as it could be used as a tool against them, to either dominate or destroy them. Being able to discern between the two—1/Antisocial aggression (that is, dominating violence, which includes “dueling aggression”); and 2/Asocial violence (that is, predation violence)—is critical.

Violence intended to destroy is usually asocial and hits you rather silently (like a bee sting or a snake bite) and, seemingly, out of the blue. All rapists (except, say, some date rapists and incest perpetrators) fit this category. Violence intended to dominate is usually antisocial and erosive, and is characterized often by a lot of posturing (like a silverback gorilla beating his chest, or a monkey shrieking and throwing his poop, or a bull rampaging in a China shop). An angry driver (in full-blown road rage) can fit this category; so, too, can a drunk fraternity “brother” (or similar individual) at a football game, where the home team’s not doing so well.

Being able to discern between a bee and an angry driver can be really helpful. It’s also helpful to know that everything that happens has a rationale behind it. Often, we just didn’t see all the energies that led up to the moment of our being attacked. If we can learn to pick up on those energies and learn, too, to avoid situations, which…

A/Foster the assembly (or collection) of such energies…

And…

B/Funnel such energies to a particular time, space, and place of releasing confluence (like when we go to a stupid place, at a stupid time, with stupid people)…

…we can reduce—almost entirely—the likelihood of our experiencing violence.

In my heart, to avert the perpetration of any physical violence whatsoever, I’m willing (and have purposed in my heart to allow myself) to be completely humiliated by someone engaging in antisocial aggression. In my heart, I’m willing also (and have heart-purposed) to use the tool of violence asocially in my efforts to disable (or even kill) someone perpetrating (or intending to perpetrate) asocial violence on me or someone around me. Even if it results in my own incarceration or my injury to the point of either permanent disability or death, I will do such things. These are all very dark and tough things to think about and to prepare for, let alone, implement.

If you want to talk about these things, feel free to reach out to me.